You clean it with WD-40 and reupholster with duct tape.


Cable went out and you have no reception.

well after you've thrown the hammer through the TV and fixed that with the duct tape. then you WD-40 the cable-end Connectors.



The Webcam wire is loose and it won't stay in one spot on the desk without sliding

Duct tape that pesky cable exactly where you want it.

A spouse/SO who constantly leaves lights on in every room of the house.

hit them in the head with the hammer until they understand!




its time to fix that rickety step

Use the hammer to pund the step in, and then spread the step in WD-40 so anyone who complains about the squeaky step....won't be around long. :D


Out of coffee filters in the mornign?

Use the claw end of the hammer to first put small holes in strips of duct tape which can be laid side by side to serve as the filter. Note, the hammer can also be used to quiet any complaints about the odd grounds that sneak through the holes. The WD-40 can be used to lubricate the floor making body disposal easier. :)

The ash tray is full.

Duct Tape...just sticky it all out until it's clean


Your boyfriend forgot to call (grrrrrrrrrr.....)

Tape his mouth shut with duct tape so the neighbors won't hear his screams when I whip his ass with the hammer handle. :D

Your lawnmower deck is broke and keeps falling down.

hammer to be sure to break it real good to buy a new one

Your head board squeeks

cover it with 3 layers of duct tape.....it may not stop the squeeking but it will give some padding for other things :D......if it still bothers have sex on the couch :D



that damn cd player isn't working properly....skipping and not always closing.

Hammer ... beat it to death and get a new one.

Flat tire

WD-40. You need it to loosen the lug nuts so you can swap in the spare.

Pesky ex.

Duct tape to shut him up and if that doesn't work use the hammer.

Broken Coffee cup?

Duct tape is the obvious answer, although a case could be made for the hammer if your goal was to eliminate the evidence.

Mice?

Calls for the hammer. No compromise.

Drafty fireplace.