Thread hijackers should be duct taped to their chairs and a liberal dose of wd-40 should be applied to their penis with a rapid & repetitive up and down motion until climax, then they should be brought a fresh cup of coffee.

Hey, it was worth a try!


Excess body hair :D

Simple..apply duct tape and rip off..apply liberal doses of WD-40 to prevent growing back.

Un-horny s/o

see the above post by WI and apply the ame measures. should do the trick!

in the spirit of christmas...yeah i know its over, but how could i fix light bulb that won't light on one side? (ala the Grinch)

Spray the tree with wd-40 and shove it up the chimney so you can bring it back to your workshop and hammer it!


That pesky mouse that won't visit the trap.

Mice love WD-40 just spray it on the cheese...

A teen age child who won't do what she's asked

trap him on sticky duct tape the tap him on the head (lightly) with a hammer and "Bad Mouse! Naughty, Naughty Mouse! Now Go Home!"

a fish that won't bite your hook

OK< Suzy and me are going around in circles together today!

duct tape the child to a chair and tap her (lightly) on the head with a hammer and say "Bad child! Naughty, Naughty Child! Now Go Home!"

how about that fish?

:D

Use your hammer to straighten out the hook and use it like a harpoon!


Your frisbee went into the neighbor's yard.

spray the dog with WD-40 so he can squeeze through the hole in the fence, and wrap duct tape around his tail so you can pull him back after he grabs the frisbee!

can you fix an empty checkbook?

absolutely!

Use your duct tape, wd-40 & hammer in the manners previously described, to remedy the aforementioned problems...and charge a fee! :D


Now what's to be done about my cold coffee?

unrole a whole role of duct tape, and scrunch it all up..pour WD-40 on it start the fire and warm your tea...use hammer to break "in case of fire break glass" in case the whole thing gets out of control

and what would you like me to do to you.




I mean, for you. ;)

Forget the duct, tape, WD-40, and the hammer, and you can do almost anything..

broken winshield...(I already used the hammer on it)

Put duct tape on the inside, and fill the cracks with wd40 & let sit overnight until it's frozen solid. Remove tape, and you're fine till spring thaw. :D


I'm late going home.

I think you should keep that as your answer for the child... :p

Now Suzy, this will take some work...

The key is to cut the duct tape into thin stips so you only tape the glass where it's broken allowing you to still see through it.

Taking care of someone who tries to remove your body hair with duct tape